By Barbara Anderson
Those wire service and network TV stories reporting on President Clinton's recent Tahoe forum may have covered journalism's standard five "Ws"--the "who, what, when, where and why"--but hey! what about the "wacky"? We knew you'd want the real scoop, so here, courtesy of Dateline UC Davis, the campus's faculty and staff newspaper, are a couple of insider stories:
While cruising Lake Tahoe on UC Davis' research vessel, the John Le Conte, Clinton and Vice President Gore discovered more than just the current state of the lake's water--they also found a cache of chocolate chip cookies in the cabin, baked by Kit Richards, wife of boat captain Bob Richards. Word has it the deck cleared as Clinton and Gore went below for samples--followed, naturally, by all those unsmiling guys in sunglasses. Later, Richards was scolded by a White House aide--not for any breach of security, but because Clinton and Gore are both on diets.
Earlier, Richards was baffled when Tim-the-Secret-Service-Agent continually referred to the "potus." "It was the 'potus' this and the 'potus' that," he said; "I couldn't figure out what he was talking about. Had we missed a definition of some piece of equipment or a procedure, or what? Finally, it dawned on me that they were talking about the head honcho POTUS or President of the United States! From then on we talked about POTUS Clinton the rest of the day."
The kind people who keep the UC Davis electronic networks humming a happy tune try hard to keep the rest of us up to speed. Herewith, a verbatim memo, posted via e-mail in July:
"Sprint is currently fighting an auto-rebooting cycle in one of its backbone routers which is causing major flaps across their entire backbone. UCOP/NOC's attempts to route UCNet Internet traffic through UCLA to MCI have failed. Once the SprintLink backbone has stabilized UCOP/NOC will return to routing through UCB and UCI as before. We will continue to post additional announcements as information becomes available."
Maybe they should just call the chiropractor.
When Aggie alumnus Stephen Robinson '78 left the launch pad aboard the space shuttle Discovery in August he took a little bit of UC Davis with him. Robinson, the first Aggie in space (or at least in outer space--we're not counting those people who show up for Whole Earth), tucked a couple of campus souvenirs into the pocket of his flight suit: a copy of The California Aggie (which will be signed by each member of the crew and then returned and displayed on campus) and a College of Engineering Distinguished Alumni Medal (Robinson is an engineering grad). And well-placed sources say that Chancellor Vanderhoef also sent along tapes of the Cal Aggie Marching Band-uh with the suggestion that NASA use them to wake the astronauts once they're in orbit.
Seems only fitting--their "Smoke on the Water" is out of this world.
As we go to press, the Arboretum Waterway is being drained; when it's dry, about a foot of sediment will be scraped out to improve flood control. All of which caused us to wonder just exactly what's been lurking under that green surface all these years. Could be nothing. Could be grungy. Or, it could be:
The top 10 things we're afraid they'll find when they dredge Putah Creek
10. Ollie the Mustang, with Bossy Cow Cow's hoofprints all over the cement boots.
9. A Captain Putah decoder ring.
8. The Humboldt State Lumberjack Marching Band, still trying to cover their axes.
7. The source of the Dining Commons' Mystery Meat Casserole.
6. The real blueprints for the Social Sciences and Humanities Building.
5. Jimmy Hoffa, wearing a dink.
4. Tasteful black-and-white studies of Bossy Cow Cow as a young heifer.
3. Archeological evidence that there were ducks the size of Yugos roaming this area as late as 1977.
2. Elvis, in full Sword and Sandals garb.
And the No. 1 thing we're afraid they'll find when they dredge Putah Creek:
The last student to bring food into Shields Library.
"Have you laid in your winter's supply of dried figs from the trees back of the Creamery? If you have not, better get busy. . . . That turnout at last Friday's assembly was sure fine. Let's keep it up, fellows. It should not be necessary to force the students to go to assemblies. It looks bad."
-- from the "Campus Chatter" column,
University Farm Agricola, Sept. 20, 1922
"Perhaps the women students do not fully realize the really great effect they have on the general appearance of the campus and on the morale of the male students by their methods of good or poor dress. Most young fellows really like to see and be seen with an attractive young lady if she is dressed in dainty clothing.... Likewise, there are few men on the Davis campus who enjoy the company of the fairer sex when they are squeezed into a piece of attire which was originally intended for hardened and grizzled men of the range. . . . We would leave a thought to be considered by the newly arrived co-ed on the Davis campus. In what manner of dress would you care to be seen if you were still in your own hometown? Would you be the dainty young lady you have been ... or would you care to appear in public in a slovenly and untidy costume which in no way adds to your attraction and appeal?"
-- from an editorial titled "The Eyes Have It,"
The California Aggie, Sept. 25, 1947
